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Friday, January 27, 2012

Palabra (Word) ~ Reinvison - Clarity

After watching the State of the Union address Tuesday night, I have been inspired to complete a writing challenge I found last month.  Ya, it's supposed to be done in December, and ya, it's a daily writing challenge that I may or may not keep up with daily... but the result is the same - to sum up the State of Cilly, to reflect on a year of change and challenges, and to move forward towards success and prosperity.  Thanks to my "constituents" for all the support you have given me.

Palabra (Word)
Encapsulate your 2011 in one word. Why that word? What would you like your word to be for 2012? Why?

Ugh... 2011.  To encapsulate 2011 in one word, I guess it would have to be Re-envision.  See, at the beginning of 2011, I had a much different vision then I had at the end of 2011.   In the beginning of 2011, I was struggling financially.  I was trying to get my coaching business off the ground, while trying to make ends meet .... and what little money I had in reserves was running out.   The thought of not being able to pay my rent, put food on the table, or keep my car running was weighing heavily on every business decision I made.  The biggest lesson I learned from 2011 was the impact that fear based decisions can make.  

Decisions made from fear remind me of getting an eye exam.  As the doctor has you look through the cyborg like goggles at the eye chart, he gives you choices on which lens is clearer ... "One? or Two?"  Hmmm... both choices seem  good... noting my hesitation he flips back to the first slide "One?"  flip flip "or Two?"  ... feeling embarrassed that I can't make up my mind, and not able to decide if the character on the third line, second to the bottom is indeed a backwards E (do they really do that?) or a 3, I say "One... I think"...  The result can be a bad prescription that causes stress and strain.

Remove the fear - in this case the fear of feeling embarrassed of not being able to see the chart, I make better decisions.  I choose carefully... and the next decision is clearer "One or Two?"  Two.  "One?"  flip flip "or Two?"  One.  Definitely one.  Suddenly, the character on the third line, second to the bottom clearly becomes a 3.  See.. I knew they wouldn't trick me with a backwards E!

In the beginning of 2011, I made decisions out of fear and my life became fuzzy and unfocused, and it caused stress and strain.   I could no longer see my goals.  My vision became fuzzy.  Everything became blurry.  I lost sight of where I was going.  It was actually a very dark and scary time.

It took alot of soul searching to start shedding some light on my situation.  I started to realize that I had made fear-based decisions.  I recognized the impact fear made on my choices.  And, as Oprah says "Once I knew better, I did better."  I sat down and got brutally honest with myself.  I looked hard at my life, my business plan, my goals, my future and my finances.  I stopped creating stories in my mind about financial failure and being destitute and helpless.  I suddenly realized the only reason I felt helpless is because I hadn't asked for help.  I found that when I faced my truth, I faced my fears, and when I faced my fears, they faded away.  I started to dial in - (flip, flip... one, or two?) and made decisions based on truth.... and suddenly, things became crystal clear.

So, that was 2011.. and now on to 2012... what word would I choose to encapsulate 2012?  Clarity ...  

 I am taking off the blinders of fear, taking my new prescription of truth, and viewing my life through new lenses.... and my future looks pretty damn good.

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