I am a river...

Wooded Stream, Douglas Mountain

I don't have the money.  I don't have the resources.  I don't have the time.  I don't know how.  I could never pull it off.  I'm too fat, I'm too lazy, I don't have enough energy, I can't keep up.  I'm unsure, I'm not smart enough, I will never fit in.  They won't like me, they won't accept me, I should just give up.

I can make a million excuses to stay mired in mud.  And, if I really want to wallow in self pity - I will believe all the excuses.  But watching MyHoney recover from what could have put many people in the ultimate mud pit has reminded me - "where there is a will, there is a way."  He has had obstacles put in his way, but he flows around them.  He is determined to not remain stagnant - he knows he is strong, powerful and swift, even at first if his recovery starts off as just a trickle.

MyHoney, finding his way around obstacles in his way...

I woke up this morning feeling stuck and stagnant.  Seems like the same old problems keep following me around.  I wanted to call defeat.  I wanted to sit in the mud and wallow in self pity.... While sipping my coffee I kept thinking to myself "I need to get out of this mindset - I need to get unstuck"  I know from coaching, I needed to shift my focus from what I couldn't do, to what I could do.... from what I don't want, to what I do want.  I don't want to be stuck.  I don't want to be mired in the mud - I want to be like a river.

 Be still like a mountain and flow like a great river. ~  Lao Tzu

Swift River, Coos Canyon - Byron M

"I am a river.... " I said to myself.  "I am a river - I go with the flow.  When obstacles get in my way, I find a way around - I find a way up, over and across.  I may start as a trickle ... I may churn and get turbulent, but I am always flowing.  I can wear down the boulders in my way..... I am a river ... I go with the flow.... at first as a trickle, then as I gain momentum, I gain strength." 

Whether you are recovering from surgery, illness, financial set backs, or if you seem to be in a holding pattern of not moving forward, you need to remember you are not a mud puddle - you are not stagnant and mired - you are a river.  When you go with the flow, you can find ways around obstacles.  With enough persistence, you can even cut through the boulders that get in your way.

Swift River, Township E

Everything that we want is downstream...  And you don't have even have to turn the boat and paddle downstream, just let go of the oars, the current will carry you. ~Esther Hicks

Once I finished my mantra, I wrote a list of all the things I can do - things that are within my control, that can get me through this obstacle I am facing.  I kept in mind that I may need to start as a trickle, and once I gain momentum, I can take on more.  With the list of things I can do to change the shape of my landscape in front of me, I felt amazingly unstuck - I will go with the flow.  I am a river.

Paradise is here, Paradise is now ~ Paradise is being in the flow.....

Dirty Laundry...

Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/roymontgomery/

I was raised you never aired your "Dirty Laundry".... meaning, you didn't share intimate details of your life outside of the family - financial problems, relationship issues, political views, and most of all you never ever talked about sex.  Ever.  In fact, we usually didn't even discuss these matters inside the family.  We were told what we believed in, and we believed it. 

The world, of course, has changed, and I am trotting along trying to keep up.  With social medias like Facebook and Twitter, every thought, idea, issue, problem, celebration and observance is broadcasted to the world in nanoseconds.  While it has given us a certain sense of freedom, I wonder .... was some sort of filter healthy, or is it healthier to know everything about everyone?   Should we try to hold on to some sort of autonomy, or is this  melting pot of thoughts and information good for our synergistic well-being?  It's this I ponder today as I drink my coffee and read my friends status updates that range from complaints about other friends and family, political debates, religous statements and worst of all, blanket statements about certain segments of society.

I'm not saying what we are experiencing now is good or bad.... It's just different, and today's post is really about accepting impermanence.   We are in a much more open society now - laundry is not only aired, but shared.  We let strangers into very intimate parts of our lives - heck, I'm doing it now just writing this blog....

The comfort I find is I still have control of my filter.  While it is not as rigid as how I was raised, I can still hold back information from the masses that I feel is better kept close, or information that I feel would spread negative energy or ill-will.  My purpose here is to be a powerful energy source that spreads love and light to all that surrounds me.  If I blurt out how my feelings were hurt by someone, or how idiotic I felt a decision was by someone beyond the realm of my control  - what good does it serve?  When posting my "laundry" dirty, clean or otherwise, I try to remember this quote

"What you reject is what you acquire. What you judge is what you become. What you fear is what you attract. What you give is what you get. Put out positive and you get back positive. What you know is what exists and what exists is what you have. If you put out certainty, you get back certainty. If you put out deception, you get back deception. If you provide hope, you feel hopeful. If you give help, you receive help. All is a complete whole; anything and everything that you put out will find its way back"

photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ljuphoto/

However, while I feel filters are good in my life, and holding back deficient energy from social media, I am grateful that friends, family, and acquaintances are opening up their lives to receive more information.  No longer do we need to feel stifled like the "children that were better seen than heard"  we were raised as.  As a professional woman, I feel when I speak my mind, and speak it well, it falls on open and receptive ears.  Again, if I am open and receptive, others will be open and receptive of me. If I feel the need to air a little dirty laundry every once in a while, I am grateful there is a clothes line to hang it on.


Now that I have that off my chest, you will have to excuse me... I have some laundry to do...



Paradise is Here, Paradise is Now.... Paradise is airing out your laundry...

I Want ..... absolutely nothing

Wanting.... it's become a fad.

You see and hear it in everything from The Secret, to numerous vision board workshops and seminars on how to "manifest your dreams into reality." The promise is if you believe it, you can achieve it.

And to some extent, yes - I agree - what you visualize becomes your reality. The Law of Attraction and Newtons Law of Motion are real - just as real as the law of gravity. That is why it kinda cracks me up when people ask me how they can start to practice or "use" the Law of Attraction in their lives.... um, well... that is like asking when gravity is going to kick in... you kind of don't have a choice - you are effected by the law whether you are aware of it or not. What ever you put out, the Universe sends back. What comes around, goes around. Period the end. Guess what - what goes up, must come down too. Count on it. If you don't believe me, go jump off a bridge and see what happens. The end result aint no Secret, I can clue you that.

When I first started out coaching, a friend of mine asked me to participate in a vision board workshop that she was leading. I was really excited because I had just started reading the Law of Attraction, and I had just watched the Secret... so I was stoked. She lead a very inspiring and motivational workshop, and at the end of the day, we all walked away of all our hopes, dreams and desires cut out of random magazines and stick-glued to a piece of posterboard.

I stared at that damn board every day for months.... I looked at the picture of the cabin in the woods, I looked at the picture of Matt Lauer and Oprah Winfrey (who will be the first ones to interview me when my book hits the New York Best seller List)... and I fascinated about the money I would have, the things I would buy, and the success I would feel. And I felt very, very empty. After a year, I crumpled up the posterboard and threw it in my campfire.

You may be asking, "But Cilly, you are a life coach... don't you believe in setting goals, striving to gain and grow, and achieving?"

Why yes, yes I do... But one lesson I have learned in my own life, and through working with clients is there is a BIG difference between wanting something and working towards a goal. Wanting produces a gap in your life - a gap between where you are now, and where you want to be... creating longing, loss, or lack. Whenever there are gaps in our life, because of the vacuum effect - it has to be filled with something... and that something is usually stress, anxiety, dissatisfaction, disappointment... or as Buddha puts it so simply... "suffering."

Working towards a goal fills that gap - because you HAVE something... you have a plan. You fully acknowledge where you are now, and you fully acknowledge what you want in your life, and you fill the gap with small, achievable steps.... but here is the real "secret"... ready for it? What really magnetizes your goals and attracts them to you is GRATITUDE.

Joel Osteen delivered a great sermon on this very topic today - praise. He said Isaiah 54 says,

“Sing, oh barren woman, you who never bore a child; break forth into song and shout for joy.” You may be at a place today where you have unborn promises; you have loved ones you’re praying for, but aren’t seeing the change; you may even feel barren. During times like these, it’s tempting to give up and say, “Too bad. It’s never going to happen.” But that’s the time when you need to praise God even more. Praise opens the door for God to move and for breakthroughs to come."

The real secret that unlocks all the doors to all our desires is not visualizing on what we do not yet have, but being grateful for what we have already been given. One of my favorite quotes is from Ralph Marston, and I believe he sums it up perfectly

“What if you gave someone a gift, and they neglected to thank you for it - would you be likely to give them another? Life is the same way. In order to attract more of the blessings that life has to offer, you must truly appreciate what you already have.”


So, my challenge to you (and when I say you, I mean me.... you can join me if you'd like) is to stop WANTING. I want nothing. I have everything I need to live my best life.

I will continue to grow, stretch, and expand by staying open to all the Universe offers, and I give thanks for the many blessings I have in my life. I am abundant beyond measure. I, alone, am enough.